I'm not dead! I think I'll go for a walk...

The Future of The Underground...

GOOD PEOPLE WANTED FOR HAZARDOUS PROJECT.
NO WAGES, BITTER APATHY. LONG NIGHTS WITHOUT SLEEP.
CONSTANT DANGER. SAFE COMPLETION, DOUBTFUL.
HONOR AND RECOGNITION IN CASE OF SUCCESS.

Dear Reader of the Underground,
As you can probably imagine, the Underground is somewhat short staffed due to the lose of a number of its writers/editors. To help fill these vacancies and insure the vitality of the Underground for future generations, the Underground is holding an open contest this summer. The contest will be used to pick students to fill the vacant membership positions within the Underground, including the position of Editor-in-Chief. Any current or incoming student and/or facility member at CCHS is welcome to compete.
So what is this grand sword-in-the-stone competition you ask? Quite simple really. Prospects are asked to convey to the Underground what they believe to be the greatest contribution to humankind. We, however, do not want any essays, paragraphs, or other standard CSAP-esque responses. Instead, you are asked to convey your thoughts via the contents of either a package of volume equal to or less than 0.125 cubic feet or an envelope of area equal to or less than 0.5625 square feet. Entries should be delivered to:

Submission Deadline Passed
Processing..............................

Entries must be postmarked or dropped off by Wednesday, July 1st. In the event of a tie, however, preference will be given to the first received entry. Entries will be evaluated based upon their creativity, hilarity, ridiculousness, philosophical merit, religious upheaval, cult following, and/or weight. All entires will be evaluated by at least three departing members of the Underground. Entries should include contact information so that we may reach you if you are selected. We encourage everyone to enter. Have a good summer, send us your thought, and good luck.